The Acolyte Episode 7 Review: Complete Trash

In another waste of an episode, not much happens and now there is only one episode left to wrap everything up.

the acolyte episode 7 review 1

Episode 7 of The Acolyte is absolute trash full of useless garbage and is a complete waste of another episode. The story is forced and has zero progression, and the characters continue to act contrary to established lore.

This episode should have easily been combined with Episode 3, and/or both episodes should have easily been incorporated throughout the other episodes to achieve the same backstory and explanations.

the acolyte episode 7

I ask again, where has the nearly $200 million budget gone? This episode features much of the same footage from Episode 3. It’s basically Episode 3.5.

Two episodes were not needed to show us the backstory and are a complete waste of budget and resources. Instead, these episodes should have been used to further progress the overall story set in the “present day.”

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Instead, we have only one (short?) episode left to explain fucking everything.

The Acolyte is put together by an incompetent showrunner. The producers associated with the show are completely incompetent. The writers wouldn’t know good storytelling if it smacked them right in the face. Everyone associated with this show has no fucking clue about Star Wars. It’s fucking embarrassingly bad.

jedi wookie

Just like the previous episodes, the Jedi are completely useless.

Sol is a fucking moron. Padwan Torbin is a little whiney bitch. Kelnacca is simply someone’s idea of thinking a Wookie Jedi would be cool (it’s not!), and while Indara is the best of the bunch, she’s a useless fucking leader, and again, she dies in the first episode by tiny daggers while wielding a fucking lightsaber!

sol acolyte episode 7

So, this episode reveals that Sol immediately clings to and has some sort of connection with Osha upon seeing her. Okay. Then how does he not know it’s Osha when Mae approaches them? He yells, ‘Osha!’ and everyone is like, ‘That’s Mae, you fucking idiot.’

Sol has no idea what the fuck he is doing. He’s clouded by his emotions (is he having a breakdown???). He’s not a Jedi. He made the same mistake years later and didn’t realize it was Mae while onboard the ship. The dude has zero clue what’s going on.

the acolyte episode 7 sol

Or how about Sol panicking and killing the mother? WTF? Sol comes off as a big creepy weirdo this entire episode. I can’t imagine George Lucas thinking Jedi act like this.

Yeah, Anakin does, but the reason is two-fold: Anakin is being influenced by a fucking Sith Lord, and he was also brought into the Jedi Order at too old an age. I assume Indara, Sol, Kelnacca, and Torbin have all been brought up as Jedi since they were basically born. So that’s like 20-40 years of Jedi training. Again, none of them come off even close to the Jedi seen in the Lucas movies.

All The Acolyte does is continue over and over to make the point that the Jedi are pieces of shit.

sol acolyte

Sol proves he’s a complete moron when it comes to saving Mae and Osha. Instead of using the Force to save both of them – who likely weigh 60 lbs. each – he decides to try to brace the bridge that weighs two tons!

I laughed when he let Mae fall to her death! HAHAHA! WTF is going on? That was also my reaction when Sol killed Mother Aniseya! And again when Indara somehow killed 50 witches!

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What about Torbin?

I’ll give you that Aniseya influencing him is pretty cool, but what’s dumb is Torbin being a whiny bitch and wanting to go home. WTF is he homesick about? Again, he’s been trained since basically birth to do this. I would think a Padawan would be humbled and honored to be going on a mission with a Jedi Master. The writing needs to be a lot better. They could have come up with anything other than him being a homesick little bitch. And paired with Sol, he’s also a crybaby bitch!

Also, I feel it made no sense that years later, Torbin would want to kill himself. Is what the Jedi did that bad? It’s not like they butchered the witches. You can argue the witches actually attacked first. The Jedi also didn’t set off any fires or explosions. The writing is so shoddy.

acolyte mother koril

What is going on with Mother Koril? She disappears. Where’d she go? Don’t tell me she’s the Sith Lord who trains Qimir. I also noticed that, similar to Sol, Qimir cries about wanting a friend and Padawan. What’s going on there? What about Osha? Is she going to join Qimir and train under the Dark Side? Is Mae now switching sides? Hey, in a galaxy far, far away they have metal detectors just like we do! How about that for a $200 million budget!

There is only one episode left. Are you prepared for the oncoming trainwreck?

This episode gets another 0/10 rating just like Episode 3.

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