NINO

Happy Day!  This trash book is finally over!  It can now be relegated to the dust bin where it and other bad memories belong.  Hopefully, Brevoort and Alonso will join it there when their Secret Wars event flops.

The art is particularly bad this issue.  I have always hated this Manga-ized version of the Nova uniform, but NINO looks particularly stupid in it this issue.  In some panels, his neck is the size of a pencil.  When his helmet is off, he has Dumbo-sized ears.  I guess that’s the source of his flight powers.

The story is just as dumb as always with NINO improbably beating a much more powerful and experienced fighter after his actions place Earth in danger.  I, as always, was rooting for the villain.  The perfect ending to this story would’ve been NINO’s death.  Sadly, he survives.  And his unfit parents look to be letting him continue to wear the helmet.  Hey Marvel, this isn’t entertainment.  It’s a tragic example of why kids shouldn’t have super-powers and shouldn’t be soldiers/cops – and why unfit parents shouldn’t have kids.  Not to mention an example of why Duggan shouldn’t be allowed to write cosmic.

Rocket Racoon and Beta Ray Bill have cameos in this issue – showing up just in time to keep NINO’s screw-up from laying waste to Earth.  Yet literally thousands of fairly large asteroids are shown left circling Earth – with no indication that NINO actually cleaned any of them up.  Irresponsible?  I guess anyone can be made an Avenger these days.   At least NINO’s upcoming Avenger book will have a short life span.  Maybe after that, Marvel will give up on this failed experiment.

NINO’s gone, and good riddance to him and his fans.  It’s been too long in coming and he won’t be missed.  Leave this one on the shelf.  Nothing to see here.  And the last issue needs to go out selling less than 18K to ice the NINO failure cake and send Marvel a clear message:  No more NINO’s!

An Opinion-Editorial Oriented Review Decrying Political Correctness in Comic Books

Duggan, like Bendis, has no real understanding of science-fiction.   They both just rip-off plot and action elements from popular cinema and televised science-fiction and science-fantasy.  This issue, Duggan copies some elements from Babylon 5 and Deep Impact to make yet another thoroughly insipid and totally implausible NINO storyline.

Duggan admits he copies teen Spiderman plot elements from the past, and he likes to take to twitter to talk about what a brave, filled-to-the-brim with integrity kind of guy he is because he resists the harsh criticism leveled at him about NINO and keeps churning out NINO trash.  Hey Duggan, that doesn’t make you brave or full of integrity.   Re-packaging well-worn tropes from comics, cinema, and TV just makes you a hack.

The eye-rolling and stomach-churning moments go hand-in-hand in this issue with Duggan having NINO take on an ultra-powerful and ultra-experienced trained warrior – and of course, totally implausibly winning.  Stupid.  Unbelievable (in a bad way).

Of course, NINO predictably continues to screw up and his screw-ups result in Earth being put in incredible danger from multiple sources including a storm of asteroids heading straight for Earth.  Also, predictably, NINO (just like all the other current cosmic characters) has the Avengers on speed dial to call to save the day because cosmic characters are such buffoons under Bendys, Duggan, Loeb, Brevoort, and Alonso – that all cosmic characters can do is screw-up and place Earth in danger.  They can’t save Earth (or anything else).  Cosmic characters can no longer effectively single-handedly deal with cosmic threats.  They just trigger cosmic threats.  Then they’ve got to call The Avengers or The X-Men for help.  How dumb is that?  Pretty dumb.  But what else do you expect from Bendys, Duggan, Loeb, Brevoort, and Alonso?  They wanted to reduce cosmic to bathroom humor level buffoonery and they succeeded.

The art continues to decline on this deplorable book.  NINO continues to look thoroughly stupid in a poorly designed manga-ish military uniform he never earned in the first place.   It’s actually painful to look at the little idiot.

With sales under 20K despite all the marketing hype, a regular cartoon appearance, and shoehorning the little idiot into every major event, Marvel needs to wake up and declare this trash the failure that it so obviously is.  But that would make too much sense.  Instead, they decided to double-down on the failed formula and do an even more politically correct version of NINO, a PC-NINO-ette as it were.  Out with the half-alien/half-Hispanic male kid and in with the black female kid.  I guess the reasoning was, “If it worked for Ms. Marvel, maybe it’ll work for NINO.”

If you’re a true fan of the original Nova concepts and you’d like to see Rich Rider back in his rightful place, its past time to take action.  Boycott, NINO and PC-NINO-ette.  Send Marvel a clear message that they need to stop replacing beloved classic characters just for the sake of appealing to political correctness in the general population.  The general population could care less about comic books. 

That being said, despite all evidence to the contrary, if Marvel thinks that there really is an enormous demographic of buyers out there just dying to buy books about female, racial minority, religious minority, and sexual orientation-minority characters – then by all means please create such NEW characters from scratch and give them a book.  Let’s have a book about a super-powered, bi-sexual, female, half-Gypsy/half-Pygmy, wheelchair-bound, Shinto priestess who’s seriously considering sex change surgery.   Sounds hilarious.   I might even buy the first issue.  This ultimately PC character would certainly please the “small but vocal” PC crowd (and their PC police force who frequently shoot the rest of us in the back as we try to flee this PC nonsense).  But please, don’t use that ultimate PC character as a replacement for Thor, Iron Man, Captain America, Black Widow, Nova, etc.   Live up to your name as the “House of Ideas,” do the courageous/non-lazy thing, and create a brand new character with the demographics you want to capture.  

When will this waste of paper be over? 

The annual sold about 18K.  That would be cancellation time for most any Marvel book – but Marvel keeps this trash on life support?  To chase a demographic of 7-12-year-old buyers that doesn’t really exist?

Hey Brevoort – you’ve got 18K of buyers with the mentality of 7-12-year-olds, but that’s about it.  Few to no actual 7-12 year olds buying comic books.  Psssst – here’s a secret:  They’re too busy playing video games. 

Despite a near unprecedented marketing campaign, a cartoon series, and shoehorning the “little idiot” (Loeb’s own description of this character) into every event – the best you’ve got is 18K for a NINO annual?  To quote NINO himself, “Epic fail!”

And Duggan, you can keep underlining Rider’s death and insulting Rider fans as much as you like in your book and on forums, but most of us will NEVER accept or embrace your NINO or your upcoming “Politically Correct NINO-ette.”  And we’ll never forgive you or Loeb for mangling the Nova mythos with this puerile garbage or for your continued disrespect for fans of the true Nova, Rich Rider.

Fact is, Duggan, like Bendis and Loeb, has no idea how to write a true cosmic story.  He writes farce.  That’s it.  The space setting is incidental, and the aliens are around purely for comic relief.   Substitute any city – New York, Mayberry, Los Angeles – literally anywhere for the space setting and change the aliens to doofus humans, and the story would read exactly the same.  Duggan even alludes to this himself when he has NINO dress up like Deadpool in this painfully bad issue.  He’s basically writing a less hypomanic Deadpool, throwing in some stars and aliens, and calling it “Nova.”  That’s pretty much what passes for “cosmic” at Marvel these days – forgettable, farcical, hackneyed stories aimed at the lowest common denominator.

The cover art looks like graphics from a bad manga-inspired video game, and the interior art is even worse with NINO looking even more ridiculously scrawny than usual wearing his dad’s uniform.  That’s not a superhero or a soldier/police officer.  NINO literally looks like what he is – a child playing dress-up. 

Tell me, NINO fans, how do you conveniently overlook the fact that NINO’s mother allows her minor child, NINO, to go off into space alone for the foreseeable future?  How is that decision even remotely plausible for anyone other than an unfit parent?

Tell me, Avengers fans, is it even remotely plausible that the real Captain America, a responsible adult in every other comic but this one, would be supportive of a minor child wielding powers of mass destruction and going into space alone risking his life and perhaps endangering the Earth with his actions (as actually happened in this issue)?

I guess NINO fans and Avenger-zombies have a low bar for plausibility.

So NINO goes looking for his dad, screws things up along the way, Beta Ray Bill and a few others have a few head-slapping “Doh!” moments as they observe his teen antic screw-ups, and the 18K of zombies who buy this clichéd nonsense will take to comic book forums and insist that it’s brilliant and original.  It’s like P.T. Barnum said, “There is a sucker born every minute.”  If you’re buying NINO, you’re one of those suckers.

What is wrong with Marvel?

They actually think this “story” about playing “hot potato” with “The Black Vortex” is entertaining?

Silly, yes.  Entertaining, no.  Unless, of course, you’re an easily satisfied zombie who will buy anything and take to the internet to defend it to the end.

It’s just typical Duggan in a typical NINO story.  Screw-up after screw-up that somehow works itself out in the end mostly due to NINO’s dumb luck or another NINO screw-up that fortuitously ends well.  Of course, the requisite cardboard villains written as if they belong in an episode of Scooby-Doo are prominently on display as always.

Of course, Duggan, not satisfied with his appearances on forums to insult Rider fans, has to throw in an insult to Rider fans in the body of the story.  Seriously, if there are any Rider fans still buying this trash, this has to be the final straw for you.  Join the rest of us in the boycott.

This is just another episode of Marvel Cosmic gone horribly wrong.  It isn’t even cosmic, really, as the space setting is just incidental.  It’s just puerile, juvenile trash aimed at 8-year-olds and played as a farce for cheap laughs for chronologically older persons with the mentality of 8-year-olds (aka Marvel Zombies).

The art continues to decline.  Thane’s “googly eyes” turn what is supposed to be the only serious dramatic scene in this ultimately stupid story into yet another Scooby-Doo moment of farce.

Cancellation of this garbage can’t come too soon.  Marvel needs to man up and admit that this experiment has been a total failure.  Unfortunately, Brevoort and Alonso are in charge, so that will never happen.  Like NINO, you can only count on them to do the most stupid thing possible and double-down on the failed formula.  Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for Bonso’s Double-Down:  “Politically Correct NINO-ette (PC-NINO-ette).”   Join us in boycotting her, too.

Silly, juvenile, disrespectful of Nova mythos and fans, and un-heroic – this book is everything you’ve come to expect of NINO.

At least NINO admits at various times in the book that he’s stupid and doesn’t know what he’s doing.  That places him in the company of the 19K of zombies still buying this trash.

Of course, Duggan either doesn’t know or doesn’t care that Xandar hasn’t existed as a planet for a long time now.  He blithely sends NINO and the Hulk on a selfish quest to repair NINO’s helmet.  Upon arriving at the somehow re-constituted planet of Xandar, they find a powerful alien who has enslaved the “remaining Xandarians” and is forcing them to perform heavy labor.  Again, Duggan either doesn’t know or doesn’t care that Xandarians are nearly identical to humans as he portrays the Xandarians as very alien.

Do you think NINO and Hulk do the heroic thing and free the Xandarians from slavery or make some attempt to resurrect Xandar?  No.  Hulk temporarily disables the alien slave lord, finds some parts to fix NINO’s helmet, then he and NINO selfishly and un-heroically leave the remaining Xandarians to be re-enslaved.  What a nice thank you to the culture who provided the loser duo of NINO and his dad their powers.  Pathetic.  Immoral.  But that’s why this trash is and ever will be “Nova In Name Only” – because no other being worthy of the uniform would ever behave so selfishly, un-heroically, and utterly disgracefully.

The art and coloring are mediocre with NINO continuing to look ridiculous in his manga-ized version of a Nova uniform.  The art used to at least distract readers from the atrocious writing, but even the art is slipping as this book comes ever closer to its recently announced cancellation date.  Given that NINO is a Loeb vanity project, it’s probably too much to hope that we’ve seen the last of NINO.  I’m not too worried about the upcoming politically correct NINO-ette – as she’ll be DOA.

So good riddance to NINO (and a hoped for quick riddance to PC NINO-ette).  Your final issue can’t come too soon and you won’t be missed.

Why doesn’t Marvel just re-name this book Pseudo-Spider-Man Redux or Pseudo-Spider-Man Lite?  Drop NINO, change a couple of supporting characters, substitute a teenage Spidey, and this story would read the same.

Seriously, this tussle with Carnage is the most blatant copycat of a Spidey story yet.  This isn’t Cosmic in any way, shape, or form.  It’s just teen Spider-Man re-told for the umpteenth time.  I realize that that’s the point of this failed experiment – to try to capture Spider-Magic once again.  It’s just a shame that a true Cosmic book with a true, mature, Cosmic hero was replaced by this hackneyed, puerile, juvenile-mentality-oriented nonsense that really belongs in an “all-ages” Spidey book.

I lost interest in Spider-Man in the early 1990’s and have never re-gained a real interest in the character or his rogue’s gallery of villains.   I can’t say I have any particular feelings for the Carnage character – but I like him better than NINO, so I was rooting for him.  Predictably, unfortunately, and un-realistically he fails in his attempt to kill NINO.  Too bad.  I’d like to see NINO 6-feet-under where he belongs.  The story is just a prolonged and predictable fight with a symbiote, pulling out all the predictable moves and tactics for fighting a symbiote.  And it even ends with a predictable Spider-Mannish dropping of the defeated and wrapped-up villain off at Riker’s Island.  Seen that story before?  Yeah, me too.  Yawn.

Since Marvel insists on keeping this book on life support for some as yet unknown reason, they at least need to stop calling it Cosmic.  Cosmic is incidental at best in this book and always has been.  Loeb just lazily usurped the look, powers, and concepts of a better-conceived true Cosmic hero – watered them down for juvenile consumption, and gave them to a Parker-ish teen screw-up.  How many times have you seen that formula?  Too many?  Yeah, me too.

Duggan has ignored the Cosmic elements for the most part, vainly trying to appeal to a non-existent demographic of pre-teen Spider-Fans.  Just as well.  Duggan is clearly not a Cosmic writer or fan – and his forays into Cosmic have been deplorably bad.  He just needs to stick to copy-catting old Spidey stories and finish driving this book well into the teens in sales so Marvel has no choice but to cancel it.  Never fear, though, NINO-zombies – because Duggan won’t take that sound advice and instead has a NINO-ette coming down the pike for you in a totally un-necessary (and doubtlessly frightfully bad) redux of Infinity Gauntlet.  Yeah, since NINO isn’t working, the thing to do is double-down on the failed concept and validate the previously un-true comparisons with GL by creating a Red NINO-ette.  Tell me Duggan, do you have any original ideas?  First you copy-cat original Spidey.  Now you’re going to try to copy-cat Starlin and GL?  And do a Miles Morales treatment of NINO in the process?  I swear, it’s almost funny that Marvel just keeps making bad things worse.

This issue’s cover art is particularly bad.  I’ve always deplored the Manga-fying of the Nova uniform to make NINO, and this cover looks like an image from a cheap video game magnifying all the Kamen Riders and Mega-Man meets Power Rangers rip-offs that are part and parcel of the NINO uniform.  The interior art ranges from sub-average to average at best.  Curiel does a fine job with the colors, but he admittedly has little with which to work and his talents would be better spent on a better book.

If you’re a true Cosmic fan, vote with your dollars and leave this title on the shelf.  Boycott Duggan’s upcoming IG redux, too.  And especially boycott this Black Vortex trash with its hackneyed “absolute power corrupts absolutely” simplistic message that could have been told in one issue and isn’t deserving of an “event.”  Seriously, compare this current fare to Annihilation, Annihilation: Conquest, War of Kings, Realm of Kings, Nova Volume IV, Guardians of the Galaxy Volume II, and Guardians 3000 – books that actually respected the Cosmic concepts and the fans of the Cosmic concepts.  The current “lowest-common-denominator of comics buyer fare” (i.e.  NINO, GotGINO, LSLINO, RRINO) will come up sorely lacking every time.  It’s time we sent Marvel a message that their current “turn Cosmic into a juvenile farce to appeal to the lowest-common-denominator of comic buyer” strategy is a failure.

It’s funny that this book was created to capture a desperately desired but near non-existent demographic of buyers aged 12 and under, but has instead really just captured about 20,000 adult-aged comic book buyers who have the mentality of age 12 or under and are slap-happy to be treated to sub-par retellings of tired old comic book tropes.

Duggan is simply not up to the task of telling a truly cosmic story. Instead, he admittedly and shamelessly simply copies teen Spider-Man storylines from days gone by. In this issue, he explores the consequences of NINO unwisely revealing his secret identity to the super-villain, Carnage. The predictable consequences and fight outcome ensue. Yawn.

As usual, I was rooting for the villain. Carnage murdering NINO would have been the optimal (and realistic) outcome, but alas, Marvel has to recoup their excessive and unwise investment in NINO, so he implausibly survives. You’d think this would be the final straw for his mother, whose life is threatened by Carnage. Yet, she implausibly continues to demonstrate that she is in no way fit to raise children as she continues to encourage NINO to risk his life, her life, and the life of NINO’s sister. As I said, it would take a 12 or under mentality to ignore all the implausibility.

When I think of all the truly innovative books that sold about the same as or better than NINO that Marvel could have kept on life-support – such as Incredible Hercules, Young Allies, Nova Volume IV, Guardians of the Galaxy Volume II, Agents of Atlas, to name a few – I just shake my head in disgust that Marvel would continue to pour resources into this unworthy tripe in their thus far vain attempt to force it to be successful. Seriously, only a ComicBookResources reviewer (aka Marvel Shill) could love this book.

We get a brief update on NINO’s unfit father, Jesse, as well. It seems the poor sap is lost in space along with a crew of equally mentally challenged idiots. It seems the idiot apple, NINO, didn’t fall too far from the tree. 

The art has typically been the only saving grace of this book, but as the sales of this book have rightly fallen off the cliff – so has the art. The cover art is amateurish and the interior art is poorly constructed as well. NINO looks less like an annoying 15-year-old character and more like a 20-something-year-old character. Curiel does his typical fine job with colors, but his talents are wasted on this book.

So join most of the rest of the comic book world and leave this book on the shelf. Let’s make 2015 the year NINO bites the dust.

[[wysiwyg_imageupload:18798:]]

Well, it’s official.

NINO is now selling less with its 25th issue than Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning’s final issue of Nova with #36.

The numbers are in for December, and NINO has a paltry 21, 805 in sales.

DnA’s Nova #36, published in April 2010, had 22,365 in sales.

Likewise, DnA’s Nova #25, which came out May 2009, had 26,172 in sales.

Even though Marvel’s Tom Brevoort and former editor Stephen Wacker tried to blame sales for the cancellation of DnA’s Nova – in an obvious attempt to quiet the fans – we see it’s absolute BS coming from them as NINO has less sales and still goes on.

If sales were indeed a factor, NINO would have been gone with issue #3, as ever since then it has sold less than DnA’s Nova.

DnA’s Nova also never received the attention from Marvel Editorial that Loeb’s crappy version has received – and yet Loeb’s crappy version still continues to fail.

Isn’t it ironic that we would rather have Joe Quesda back as Marvel EIC than Axel Alonso, who royally screwed over Marvel Cosmic because of the Guardians of the Galaxy movie?

Bring back Richard Rider as Nova.

#NixNino.

(numbers via ComicChron)

With the release of NINO #25 on Christmas Eve, Marvel has essentially dropped a lump of coal into everyone’s Christmas stocking.

The entire run of this series has been characterized by insipid, implausible, intelligence-insulting stories aimed at the pre-pubescent mentality combined with absolute contempt for the Nova mythos, legacy, and long-term fans – but this issue takes all of those deplorable characteristics to new levels.

Apparently (the real) Captain America has become demented with the loss of his powers as he actually inducts the little “idiot” (Loeb’s own description of the character he created) into The Avengers.  Really?  Bad enough that NINO’s parents are unfit – but are The Avengers now a deliberate, official accessory to child endangerment?  Apparently so.  Maybe government regulation of The Avengers wasn’t such a bad idea after all – as Child Protective Services sure needs to investigate this decision.

Of course, Duggan continues to demonstrate his lack of awareness of and/or his contempt for Nova continuity by completely ignoring the healing factor inherent in possessing Nova powers – as NINO is (unconvincingly) portrayed as suffering from numerous contusions, abrasions, fractures, and cognitive deficits – injuries that should be long healed by a Nova’s healing factor.  But then again, NINO isn’t a true Nova – so maybe there’s hope for a rapid and (hopefully) fatal decline in his condition.

This double-sized issue does little more than double-down on the whopping case of stupid that surrounds and pervades the NINO concept.  For some unknown reason, Marvel seems intent on shoehorning the little idiot into everything they possibly can – and despite their unprecedented marketing efforts and sales gimmicks – NINO still is unable to crack the top 100 in sales.  That spells “failure of concept,” Mr. Brevoort.

Duggan’s story plods along with the thoroughly un-interesting minutiae of NINO’s everyday life and thoroughly implausible Avengers induction until the end when NINO saves the day in an utterly contrived plane crash situation clearly added to provide some kind of action to this otherwise utter waste of color glossy paper.

Baldeon’s cartoonish art is the perfect choice for a book aimed at the Archie Comics crowd of buyers.  Baldeon’s portrayal of NINO in his manga-uniform makes NINO appear exactly what he is – an annoying kid playing “dress-up as a Power Ranger.”  Curiel’s colors are perfect as usual – but this book is a waste of his talents.

This issue begins with NINO asking himself how he stacks up against his predecessors.  I have the answer to that question, NINO (and Duggan).  You don’t stack up.  You’re a bad concept made for all the wrong reasons and you’re written poorly.  You’re an insult to the Nova legacy, mythos, and long-term fans.  In every way, you’re a Nova In Name Only.

So take this lump of coal in your Christmas stocking and do what you’d normally do with a lump of coal.  Burn it.  Better yet – leave it on the shelf to send Marvel a clear message that NINO is unacceptable.  Let’s make 2015 the year that we end NINO once and for all.

In this cliché-filled arc, Duggan has NINO take on Hulk’s Hulk – also known as “Kluh,” and NINO un-believably manages to defeat him with the overdone “shoot the Hulk into space trick.”  How many times have you seen that one?  Too many.  At least Duggan freely admits that he “shamelessly” copies the story ideas of others.  And what does that matter?  The zombies will still buy this book and will take to Facebook and CBR Forums to defend it no matter the poor quality, implausibility, and lack of originality.

At least the annoying little jerk gets the beat-down he deserves and his “magic helmet” gets damaged in the process.  I was rooting for Kluh to put him out of our misery – but, alas and unsurprisingly, Marvel keeps him alive to shoehorn into the next event in their ongoing desperate attempt to force feed NINO to the comic-reading audience at large.  This – despite the fact that all but the zombies have soundly rejected NINO, and the book is well out of the top 100 in sales.

Once again, NINO’s mom won’t be winning any “Mother of the Year” awards as she continues to endanger his life by actually encouraging him to go fight Kluh.  Apparently Duggan doesn’t have a problem with the morality of ongoing child endangerment – or like Brevoort – doesn’t have the courage to actually address the issue even when directly asked.

Then again – Spiderman and (the real) Captain America should know better, too.  They are also complicit in endangering the life of a minor child.  But why should anything in this ongoing travesty of a book make any sense?

The coloring for this arc is overall well done – but the art has been sub-par.  I’ve always hated the manga-inspired uniform, but Baldeon over-emphasizes all the worst qualities of it – making NINO look even more ridiculous than usual in it – more than ever looking like a kid wearing his father’s old military uniform.  The ranking star on the helmet looks like a large glob just plopped onto the front.  Awful.  But the zombies will take to Facebook and CBR Forums to insist that the art is wonderful, too.

But mostly, this book is just an ongoing insult to and diminution of the Nova legacy and concepts.  Perhaps the best way to demonstrate that is in pictorial form:

We’ve gone from this:

[[wysiwyg_imageupload:18045:]]

To this:

[[wysiwyg_imageupload:18041:]]

To now this:

[[wysiwyg_imageupload:18043:]]

Sad.  Pathetic.  Way to go, Marvel.  Keep dishing up this warmed-over gruel and tripe for the zombies – and don’t dare question your bad decision to let Loeb hi-jack the concepts and water them down to the level of My Little Pony.

Thanks, A-Holes.

[[wysiwyg_imageupload:18044:]]

Now – cue the zombies to take to Facebook and CBR Forums to defend this garbage and hurl insults at me and anyone who agrees with me.